I want to write

August 11 (later)

I’m getting these random needs to write. I guess it’s really just that I miss or want to communicate with others…I have heard that people need to socialize. Otherwise, you just go crazy! Hmm…but what about if the person is already a little crazy…
Ugh…so I’ve been worried that each time I eat some meat that I’ll get heartburn. Luckily that hasn’t happened…but I kind of feel it creeping up on me…and I didn’t have pork today! ><”
Oh yea, a note on eating. So since I’ve been here, I’ve had a mixer of homecooked meals and eating out/buying bentos. Well, during the times that I was on my own (hotel and now) I didn’t eat all that much. Doing the homestays though…they kept pushing food at me! Why would I refuse? ;P So basically, I’m either the same weight or I’ve lost some already…I really don’t know since I never really pay any attention to it…
Damn…really wish I had some internet right now…I should work on that next…
Oh, yea. So another reason I may be feeling rather down and alone is that for the past 2 weeks or so I’ve been living out of my suitcases. That alone gives off the feeling of visiting and being on vacation. So…now that I’m trying to unpack and cleaning someplace because I want to unpack is the just the dawning of the reality that this is my place for the next year…and possibly more. I will say that I am tempted to stay here longer. I feel like a year will go by so fast that I won’t have enough time to really take in this great opportunity…but the apartment (at the moment at least) really makes me just want to stay a year…so…lots of thinking to do…
Hmm…
Grr…really wish I had someone with me right now…I don’t mind doing all the cleaning…just someone here to talk to while I do it…rather than listening to myself and all the voices in my head…one of them loves to remind me of creepy things and scary true stores right before I go to bed…so it drives my nerves crazy at night and then I can’t fall asleep right away…><”
…yea…I think that from right now ‘til I really settle in…I’ll be going more insane than I already am…